What about your Friends?

If wedding planning has taught me anything, it has taught me the importance of knowing who your friends are. I think when people think of friends, different meanings come to mind. I am talking about the people you call when you are depressed, happy, angry, or bored.

When I first wrote up my guest list, I had images of being reunited with old college friends, old high school friends, and present good time friends. Don't get me wrong, I would have a fabulous time with these people, but in the grand schemes of being budge conscious; somethings gotta give.

It was really hard in the beginning. I couldn't take off my old college friends who I never speak to except for the occasional facebook comment. I am plagued amnd guilted by old memories of all nighters, trips to Wawa in the middle of the night, tearful confessions about stupid ass boys, and etc. They were part of life that helped shape who I am today and part of me feels guilted into inviting them to my big day. But in reality, I have no idea what they are doing these days, who they are dating, or if they have a job. Did they follow the dreams we discussed in our dorm rooms or did they follow a completely different path?

Then I was confronted with people whom I am aquaintances with throughout my life and for some reason I feel like I MUST invite this person to my wedding. Their names appear on the guest list to my bridal shower even though in reality we have never chatted on the phone, never did anything that remotely resembled friendly-like.

I then had to choose between my current graduate school friends and my newly found good time friends. My graduate school friends studied with me in the library all night long, they dragged me to houkkah bars to unwind, they bought me food or vice versa when money was clearly not there. My good time friends only call me when they want to go out or meet boys or are bored. They have never celebrated my birthday with me, nor did they grace my new apartment with their prescence.

Seriously, I was conflicted and then my photographer/graphic designer said something profound to me; "Nobody has that many friends."

Although I like to think that I really am that popular, I realized she was right. When I am aching to hang out with my girlfriends, half of these people don't even come to mind. So why the hell am I spending money for them to come to my wedding?

Needless to say I cut that list quick! There are still some people who won't be invited, that I would like to come for sentimental reasons, but I'll get over it. For my special day and for the rest of my life, I would like to be surrounded by friends who are forever and not just those who are just there for the "moment". I'm just glad I can sleep soundly at night with out dreams of guest lists trying to kill me.

Wedding Planner Search: is it Over?

I have been MIA for a couple weeks because I started my second clinical rotation. The hours are killing me but hopefully my body is getting used to being up at 5 in the morning.
On the wedding tip: I emailed a wedding planner that I had been interested in a few months ago and we had a phone conversation earlier this afternoon. Compared to other Wedding planners, I really like her so hopefully it works out after I see her estimated price quote. I have been fighting the idea of having a wedding planner but I really need one. The reality is really hitting me that our wedding is seven months away and I have so much to do. I feel a tad overwhelmed on the wedding front in addition to all the other stuff I have to do before I officially finish my academics in Dec.
I am determined to get right back into wedding planning again. Why do I suddenly feel tired again?
My parents are still trying to squeeze more people out of the guest list and it is soo not happening. I'm trying to streamline my personal guest list so they can have a few more people but at the same time I don't want to. I would like my close friends to be at my wedding as well, so I don't want to budge too much.
Happy Sunday!

Guests List Grievance

So I thought I finalized my guest list and was pretty happy about it. I finished my first rotation and of course since I loved everybody, I wanted them all to come to my wedding. But the thing is, we agreed on 140 guests for both sides. While I do want all my friends there, I have to be aware that my family has to come as well. This whole guest list is super hard and its driving me crazy. I don't want to forget anyone! I'm making a list again and just cutting people out as I go along.
There are people that I was close to in the past but haven't spoken to in a long time. Should I invite them anyway? Do I have to invite couples? For instance, I am really close to the wife but don't really have a relationship with the groom. Is it rude to only invite the wife? I know I would be mad if someone didn't invite my husband, as we go everywhere together. I tried to solve this quandary on Theknot.com but didn't find any answers. Any suggestions? I think I answered this question already. But really, how can I make the guest list thing easier?

School is dragging me down man Part 2

When I wrote this I did not realize it would be a part two but thats life I guess. School is still dragging me down. I'm tired all the time and I miss spending time with my baby. My schedule is all over the place but whatever. I finally bought some books today and I got a lap top!!! I am so excited about that, its been a long time coming. I really have no business writing today because I have absolutely nothing interesting to say, but I had to test drive the lap top.

So the FI and I were downtown and we walked into this huge cathedral. It was beautiful inside and very intimidating. We brainstormed about the possibility of having a "church wedding". He was more against it than I was but he likes the idea of getting married in a cathedral. I got excited because that meant I could invite more people to the actual wedding. But after careful thought, we realized that this would mean that the church would be divided into two parts: the haves and the haves not.
Some would have the reception card and some would not. It might work but knowing my culture, people would bombard my mother with phone calls demanding entrance to the reception or bombard the reception demanding to be granted entrance. Either way people's feelings will be hurt. Haha. So we thought the best plan of action would be to simply invite people who would also be attending the reception also. It would essentially be a "closed wedding", but we realize that there will be a few crashers. We are keeping the church wedding in mind.

So we'll see. Once the budget is set and I get serious about finding the venue, we can start on the guest list. That is the part that scares me the most.